burnt orange nostalgia
A six hour nap...isnt' really a nap, it's just sleep. So I guess I slept. For most of the day. And after waking up and eating and playing on the piano, I've come to realization:
I don't like change.
I try to embrace it, and I bite the bullet and just deal with it, but I've just never liked big changes. I don't like the fact that I'm never going to see Hayden 1014 again. I don't like the fact even though I haven't unpacked all of my shit yet, in 4 months, it's all getting packed again and going into yet another dorm, yet another floor, yet another room. I am so goddamn sentimental, and I hate that I can't help it. I wish I could care less about so many things that I brood and obsess over, but I guess it wasn't meant to be that way.
Anyway, enough of that sentimental crap (see, this is how I try to make myself seem less brittle--'sentimental crap')
Studying for/taking the politics final was a nightmare and I'm so glad that's over with. After the final, it was mostly wine + happy music + sad packing for a loooong time. Sat around with the people left on the floor, went to all the places we needed to go to before leaving (i.e. the Pizzaria, the deli for beer, gray's, ordering in from Spice) and by 3 am I had a headache that last until I was back home. I don't know if it was me already being hungover but it sucked. Went to bed at 5, got up at 9 to finish packing. Went to the bookstore to return some books, saw Washington Square Park blocked off for commencement which is tomorrow...I can't imagine how everyone is going to fit, but it must be quite a spectacle.
And then...loaded up the car with Elena and left.
Any genuine emotion in goodbyes is always hidden under generic "have a great summer," and oddly polite hugs, and seeing all of the things I was leaving behind (lamp, little wooden table, the pinata, tiki torch) lying in the hallway with the other trash made me feel sad. But that's over, and here I am, writing the inevitable nostalgia post in my blogger, post-move out.
So I guess that was freshman year.
I don't like change.
I try to embrace it, and I bite the bullet and just deal with it, but I've just never liked big changes. I don't like the fact that I'm never going to see Hayden 1014 again. I don't like the fact even though I haven't unpacked all of my shit yet, in 4 months, it's all getting packed again and going into yet another dorm, yet another floor, yet another room. I am so goddamn sentimental, and I hate that I can't help it. I wish I could care less about so many things that I brood and obsess over, but I guess it wasn't meant to be that way.
Anyway, enough of that sentimental crap (see, this is how I try to make myself seem less brittle--'sentimental crap')
Studying for/taking the politics final was a nightmare and I'm so glad that's over with. After the final, it was mostly wine + happy music + sad packing for a loooong time. Sat around with the people left on the floor, went to all the places we needed to go to before leaving (i.e. the Pizzaria, the deli for beer, gray's, ordering in from Spice) and by 3 am I had a headache that last until I was back home. I don't know if it was me already being hungover but it sucked. Went to bed at 5, got up at 9 to finish packing. Went to the bookstore to return some books, saw Washington Square Park blocked off for commencement which is tomorrow...I can't imagine how everyone is going to fit, but it must be quite a spectacle.
And then...loaded up the car with Elena and left.
Any genuine emotion in goodbyes is always hidden under generic "have a great summer," and oddly polite hugs, and seeing all of the things I was leaving behind (lamp, little wooden table, the pinata, tiki torch) lying in the hallway with the other trash made me feel sad. But that's over, and here I am, writing the inevitable nostalgia post in my blogger, post-move out.
So I guess that was freshman year.
posted by Deb Oh at 9:32 PM
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